Ungovernable, unnamable, free.

ImageMy dear friend, Lulu Torbet, – extraordinary woman, artist, photographer, writer, beloved by all those who knew her – died on Monday, April 11th, 2016. She died as she lived: surrounded by explosions of joy and affection, showered by the glowing love of her relatives and many friends. Lulu and her laughter and twinkling eyes will be missed so much. Her spirit lives on within me; thanks to the MANY precious memories we created together.

I love you, Lulu.

THE SHELL by David Whyte

An open sandy shell
on the beach
empty but beautiful
like a memory
of a protected previous self.
The most difficult griefs
ones in which
we slowly open
to a larger sea, a grander
sweep that washes
all our elements apart.

So strange the way
we are larger
in grief
than we imagined
we deserved or could claim
and when loss floods
into us
like the long darkness it is
and the old nurtured hope
is drowned again
even stranger then
at the edge of the sea
to feel the hand of the wind
laid on our shoulder
reminding us
how death grants
a fierce and fallen freedom
away from the prison
of a constant
and continued presence,
how in the end
those who have left us
might no longer need us
with all our tears
and our much needed
measures of loss
and that their own death
is as personal
and private
as that life of theirs
which you never really knew,
and another disturbing thing,
that exultation
is possible
without them.

And they for themselves
in fact
are glad to have let go
of all the stasis
and the enclosure
and the need for them to live
like some prisoner
that you only wanted
to remain incurious
and happy in your love
never looking for the key
never wanting to
turn the lock and walk
away
like the wind
unneedful of you,
ungovernable,
unnamable,
free.

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